What you see, is what they could get

There was a certain unintentional hilarity about Urban Meyer’s book being in the humor section of the bookstore, being it’s a tome on “leadership” from a football coach.

Of course, it would have been even funnier if this same “leader” hadn’t been accused of covering up for an abusive assistant, engaging in certain activities in a bar with a woman who is not his wife or kicking his players.

After all, there’s gross humor, but there also stuff that’s just gross.

However, I didn’t assign any greater meaning to it other than there was an overflow in the sports section, which spilled into the first couple shelves of humor.

I started to take notice once we were out in the mall, and a remix of Imagine Dragons’ “Radioactive” started playing over the speakers. (I have no idea if the one above is the one that was on; it’s just one of the ones I saw on YouTube.)

Walking around the mall revealed it further — even if many of the stores were the same from mall to mall, they have always had to be heterogenous to some degree in order to be as many things as possible to many people.

You had your department-store anchors, your upscale clothing, your food court, your bookstores, your home goods, your stuff for the kids and some niche shops …

… like your sports cards and collectibles stores.

We saw one of those on one end of the mall, empty, so we thought it had closed. But no, it had just moved to a different location.

On display were wall hangings of famous athletes, including of Daniel Jones and Lawrence Taylor in what appeared to be some collection called “Flawless.” I’m guessing the Giants fans in my life might have some thoughts on that.

And then, came the mother lode.

Before me was a selection of die-cast cars that was a glorious callback to NASCAR midfields in the late 1990s and early 2000s. Had I quickly been able to figure out how to arrange my sports room to accommodate them, I probably would have walked out with at least three or four.

Were any of them among my favorite drivers? Nope. But the kitsch value, especially at $19.99 each, couldn’t be beat.

Like much of the rest of the mall, were those cars, were the items in this store — the NFL-themed slippers and overly fuzzy San Francisco 49ers sweaters — what they would have wanted?

Not a chance. But in a time when neither malls nor sports collectibles are what they used to be, it was what they could get.

It wasn’t heterogeneous, designed to appeal to all audiences. It was random, designed to have … something there.

I could cheat and see what Unsettled Geeks is and what it sells, or maybe I’ll wait until I’m at the mall again … whenever that is.

Since we last saw each other …

From RJ: “You must have known, you realize, as you watch beams of light dance on the water. Even then. Not that you hated yourself. Not that you wanted to be dead. You must have known that you wanted to live. Why else would you have come here?”

Austin (and Aaron) weigh in on the Oscars. I used to be into them, but now I couldn’t care less.

Pea Green’s younger boy has started something new.

Renata is going to be herself, no matter what.

These are wise words from Shirley, even if they hit way too close to home.

Many thanks to Savannah for the reminder that Miami is nice this time of year.


Happens to all of us sometimes.

You know who you are, and I know who I am.

One thing that talking about sports does … if you don’t have a clue and are just saying stuff because you think it’s clever, you will be exposed quickly.

I’m the guy who would either screw up the plan because I got too anxious, or the one kicked out of the group because I was so anxious.

If I don’t eat the 12 cookies, that means the 12 cookies may get eaten by people who aren’t me.


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