The Captain’s Quiz 7: Well, that’s new

A new year means new opportunities, a clean slate, a fresh start.

And since’s Paul’s first quiz of 2022 is about the new, the fresh, the just beginning, it’s a chance to improve on my not-very-good form of recent efforts.

I do hope things get better soon. It’s cold here in the basement, and the food isn’t very good.

THE 10 QUESTIONS

1. In the first “High School Musical” movie, Troy and Gabriella sing a song called, “Start of Something New”. What are three things you would tell kids before they start high school?

• You are at the bottom of the totem pole, and the older kids will probably remind you of that on a regular basis. Remember how crappy it made you feel when you’re the older kid someday.
• Being popular is nice, but what’s more important is to find your people. They don’t have to be “cool,” so long as you’re with them and they’re with you.
• If you’re thinking of asking that boy or girl out, do it. The worst thing that can happen is that they say no. OK … maybe no with some ridicule thrown in, but that’ll pass and you’ll be fine.

2. The first iPhone came out in 2007 and thousands of people lined up to get one. What is the longest you’ve ever stood in a line? What was it for? Was it worth the wait?

Does driving through New York City traffic to get to a wedding in New Jersey count? Because that took hours. The wedding was fun, though.

But since it probably doesn’t count, the longest lines I can remember in recent memory were flying from Dublin, Ireland, back to Boston, where we had to go through Irish security, American security and then Customs (instead of doing it when we got to Boston).

All told, it may have been 45 minutes to an hour, but when the time is ticking and you’re not entirely sure you’ll make your flight, it seems a LOT longer than that.

We made our flight, though, so I guess it was worth it.

3. On the game show, “The Price is Right,” they often give away a brand new car and most contestants jump up and down in excitement. If you won a new car on TV, how would you feel?

I’d be thrilled, because I just won … A NEW CAR!!!! (Insert Rod Roddy voice here.)

4. Four teams in the NFL have the word “New” in their name: New Orleans, New England, and New York (x2). What are three words that have “new” anywhere in the word.

• Newcastle
• Newport
• Newman

5. In what year did your favourite artist/band put out their latest album? How many songs are on that album and how many of them do you like?

Sugarland released “Bigger” in 2018. It was their first album in eight years, and I never thought it would happen after Jennifer Nettles went solo. (They played a virtual concert at the start of the pandemic and talked with the host about possible new music, but it hasn’t happened yet.)

There are 11 songs on the album, and they’re all wonderful.

6. Many items (books, cars, video games, clothes, etc.) can be bought used, instead of new. Tell me about some used items you’ve purchased.

My first several cars were used, but the one I remember best is the first one, naturally.

It was the late summer of 1989. I was 17, and soon to get my driver’s license. My parents and I went to a used car lot (a barn with cars for sale behind it), and while we saw a few cars that looked interesting, nothing really stood out.

And then, as we were getting ready to leave, the owner pulled in with a red Dodge Aries … a 1986 if memory serves.

Sold.

By the time I was done with that car, I had used … it … up. It was known as the “MacGyver car” for all my father’s creative fixes, the greatest of which was clearly the toggle switch he wired to the engine fan so I could turn it on and off from under the dashboard.

7. What foods are just as good, if not better, as leftovers?

Lasagna

Also, lasagna.

Did I mention lasagna?

Also good … spicy chicken wings, if they’re cold. Cold pizza is massively overrated, but while I don’t eat spicy wings when they’re freshly made, eating them cold provides a wing taste with just a tiny bit of kick, and not a massive burning sensation.

8. You need a new pair of shoes. Describe the process of finding the perfect pair.

First, I need to decide the shoes I have are worn out to the point where I have to buy a new pair.

Then I look for a style I can live with for the lowest price possible (and if it’s sneakers, I only wear Nike). I try to find a pair in my size, and if I do and they’re comfortable, I buy them.

Seems pretty simple, right? It’s not. I often agonize over which one is just right.

9. Would you rather have a new friend, a new book, or a new TV show to watch? Explain your choice.

I don’t see the friends I have as often as I like. I’ve been bad at reading books, but Suzi and I are always on the lookout for TV shows to watch together, so I would say TV show.

10. The Newlywed Game is a game that married couples, as well as friends, play to see how well they know each other. The last person you texted/sent a message to, is your partner. How well would you do at this game?

Suzi was the last person I texted, including a recent conversation about Josh Groban tickets and specialist toilet plungers (yes, at the same time). I reckon we’d do pretty well.

BONUS QUESTIONS

1. You just got a new job and must introduce yourself by sending a group email to your new co-workers. Write your introductory email as if you’re typing it while riding a rollercoaster.

Hiiiiiiiiii, evvvveeerrrryyyybbbboooddddy. IIIIII’mmmmm BBBBBBiiiiillllll. IIIIIII’mmmm ….. AAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!

And there goes my phone … off to parts unknown.

2. A new restaurant is opening in your town. You decide to go there for dinner a month after they open. Write a review of your experience. (All the details: name of restaurant, food, layout, etc., are up to you).

There’s a framed dollar bill on the wall behind the counter at Monty’s Diner. It’s from the local bank, and the certificate says it’s the first dollar of pure profit.

That’s a good sign. Also a good sign … people refilling their own coffee cups without having to get permission from the waitress.

Yet another good sign … the group of eight gathered around two tables pulled together in the back. The food is long eaten, but no one seems in a hurry to leave.

Yes, Monty’s is a proper diner, not a suburban restaurant cosplaying as a diner.

It’s also a proper diner because the chocolate milk has syrupy residue a quarter-inch up the glass to stir with your long spoon. A

But most importantly, the turkey is piled high on the open-face sandwich, the mashed potatoes have threaded the needle between runny and lumpy, and there’s enough gravy on both to drown a horse.

This is the kind of place you want to go for dinner on a small-town Friday night.

3. You are the creator of a new social media platform. Tell me about it.

It will be called Supreme, after the supreme ruler of the platform.

That would be me.

I would own it, and the only people I allow on would be people I invite or approve. (Of course you would be. Don’t be silly.) You can write as much or as long as you want, post videos and photos and chat with each other and me.

Think of it as all the fun of social media without the rotten people.

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