They don’t miss a trick

Most of the deliveries we get of actual value — also known as Suzi’s way-too-small whatever in a way-too-large box, plus sometimes books — is delivered by UPS, FedEx or random person someone hired to drop it off.

Most of what comes to our mailbox that’s not her Boden deliveries or bills is trying to sell us something, about 85 percent of which goes immediately into recycling.

But the other day, we got something refrigerator-worthy … next year’s Portland Sea Dogs schedule.


For me to say anything nice about the Red Sox takes some doing, so for me to gush about going to see their AA affiliate at Hadlock Field in Portland takes some serious doing.

And since I ordered the tickets online to go this summer, they wanted to make sure I knew I could book our “9-inning vacation” Nov. 2, either online or at the ballpark.

People who buy their tickets in person can take part in a Hadlock Field Yard Sale, swing for season tickets, meet Slugger the Sea Dog (who wants to make it very clear he’s NOT interested in being mayor), get free coffee and doughnuts and save 20 percent at the souvenir store.

But none of those are the pièce de résistance.

As someone who owns random Connor Hellebuyck and Albert Almora Jr. bobbleheads, just because they were being given away, you’ll never catch me dissing a bobblehead, and the thought of a professional baseball player raking my yard for real is amusing.

What I love about the offer, however, is not that you can get a bobblehead by spending $55 on tickets at the ballpark or $65 online, but that you can get one for each $55 or $65.

While supplies last, of course, just in case there’s a run on Michael Chavis bobbleheads.

Ticket prices in Portland run from $6 general admission for children and seniors to $11 for box seats for adults, so somewhere between six and 10 tickets probably gets the job done.

But if you want to go nuts and get boatloads of tickets, you can get enough bobbleheads to keep in multiple rooms, or to give out as Christmas gifts! It’s never too early, right? (Except when it is too early, like Nov. 2.)

I think I’ll take a pass, but I am looking at the schedule. June 18 against Trenton, including fireworks, looks pretty interesting, except it’s a Thursday night and I do live two hours away.

But I do promise I’ll get to another game without waiting another 12 years.



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