For brains, just add water

My rewards card wasn’t scanning properly, but it wasn’t really a big deal.

It wasn’t going to save me any money, plus it’s attached to my keychain and is kind of beaten up anyway, so having to scan it multiple times wasn’t a shock.

But the woman at the register was apologetic about making me dig my keys out of my pocket again, explaining that if the software “were any dumber, they’d have to water it twice a day.”

I have a good-size vocabulary that draws from different influences — one that has emerged lately is “numpty” (interestingly enough, about the same kind of person) — but I had never heard that one before.

She said it was from when she lived in Texas, and then we traded notes over someone we both agreed would probably be dumb no matter how much water you poured on him.

So even though the plants at my house are, of course, brilliant (and rain takes care of most of the watering), yes, I am absolutely going to steal that one.


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