What app keeps you from saying something dumb?

Because I’m a helper, I was helping out with some relationship advice on Twitter yesterday afternoon.

Namely, by explaining that guys LIE ALL THE TIME.

Why does every boy on tinder claim to love the gym and travelling the world? Doesn't anyone just want to eat take out and binge watch Netflix on the sofa these days? 😫🤷🏻‍♀️😂

— edgeofaprecipice (@edge0fprecipice) August 27, 2018

That makes me feel so much better haha.

— edgeofaprecipice (@edge0fprecipice) August 27, 2018

While my single days were back in the time when blind dates meant getting fixed up by a friend, coworker or relative or answering personal ads in the newspaper — the ads in the “alternative weeklies” were primarily for entertainment, unless you were into that sort of thing — my wife and I kinda sorta had an experience with a dating app.

A few years ago, we were eating dinner in London and were sitting next to a young couple on a first date. The restaurant was probably a little too expensive for them, and I think he may have been a little nervous, but they were trying.

The proximity made for easy overhearing (don’t dare call it “eavesdropping”), and it sounded like they may have been fixed up on a dating app.

This caused our hero to proclaim, “We probably wouldn’t even be on this date if it weren’t for your meddling friend.”

Like he was a Scooby-Doo villain.

Since we left before they did, I can’t tell you how the date ended, other than it didn’t end right that moment with her stomping out of the restaurant.

I can tell you that when I was single, I had no skills in dealing with women — I just about stuck my foot all the way down my throat on my first date with my wife — but I even thought, “Dude, that’s just not smart.”

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